Do not ever dare to die inside the Houses of Parliament! It is Illegal
I don’t really know how you will get in the Parliament but if you do it and you feel close to death, don’t think twice! Run straight to the first emergency exit where you can rest in peace. If you don’t manage to evacuate before you die, you will have to face the law

Postage stamps should be affixed properly
If you place head upside down the Monarch-stamp on your envelope, your action is considered as an ‘act of treason’

Toilet policy!
a) In Scotland, you must be prepared to let anyone passing by to use your toilet if they are in need
b) A pregnant woman is allowed to relieve herself anywhere she wishes; even in an officer’s helmet
c) A man is allowed to pee in public as long as he is a motorcyclist and while he urinates is standing on the rear wheel of his vehicle with his right hand touching it

Drunkenness prohibition!
a) You are not allowed to get drunk if you are in possession of a cow
b) Not allowed to be drunk in Licensed Premises (e.g. pubs and bars)

Wife beating
In London, you are not allowed to beat your wife before 9pm; she needs some time to rest! Wife beating is aloud after 9pm as long as it doesn’t disturb the neighbours

A bed may not be hung out of a window
No comment!

How to kill a Welshman?
An Englishman is allowed to kill a Welshman on the walls of Chester at 2am as long as he is using a bow and arrow. Make sure your watch is accurate before you shoot; killing him before or after 2am is considered a crime

Hot to kill a Scotchman?
In York it is perfectly fine to kill a Scotchman with a crossbow from Monday to Saturday. You are not allowed to kill him on Sundays, unless he is drunk or bearing a weapon

Gambling
It is illegal to gamble inside a library

The dead whale
If you happen to come across a dead whale along the UK coastline, you have to chop off its’ head and tail and then hand them over to the Queen. They will be used to ‘furnish the Queen’s wardrobe with whalebones’

By Emmanuel Linardatos